It makes me laugh sometimes how I have the audacity to be surprised by God. I claim to have faith, but looking back on my life I've seen myself give up on Him quickly when I didn't feel that things were moving along my way, or prayer answered quick enough. On the flip of that coin, when I have been faithful and patient, I still get surprised when my prayer is answered, when my needs are met.
Case in point, I mentioned on my last blog that I had slept two nights in a row. Well, now it's been 4 nights in a row. I had been concerned about my sleeping for the YL Camp trip this summer. I didn't know how taking meds and odd sleep hours of camp would work. Now, I haven't taken any meds and have slept like a baby for almost a week.
Also, I've been praying and studying and telling the world about my involvement with YL, as well as my goal to raise $650 for one student in need to be able to go to camp. I had a garage sale on Saturday. My family brought me some stuff, donating it to the cause. I had planned on having it this past Saturday, but was concerned because in my city, we can't post garage sale signs. I found out just a couple of days before that my HOA in my community was actually going to have a neighborhood wide garage sale on the same day and would be posting signs at the entrances, on Craigslist and in the local paper. What are the odds that the community's once a year sale fell on the day I had been preparing for?? I also told my mom and dad (who helped me at the sale) that it would be amazing if I could just make enough money to be half-way to my goal. Well, with the change given at MOPS, we reached $320, just $5 short of exactly half-way. I was also able to tell more people about YL during the course of the day.
There's also Dusty's job. We were so concerned for months, and the day I decided to be part of YL, he gets offered his old position back, with a raise, with the hours (and bonus) he never was able to get before.
I feel so foolish! I know in the past if things didn't work out, I became angry, at critical moments, I remember even blaming God. And then when I am turning to Him, relying on Him, trying to know Him, trying to change my life and reach others for Him, I have the audacity to be surprised by him, by what seems to be the very real presence of Him, very clear message, very definite answer to prayer.
I think as Christians, we sometimes think that we are better than the rest. That somehow we think we will get favorable treatment. This is why I think we are so surprised when we aren't exempt from this world's trials and pain. But isn't that what really strengthens our faith? If we became followers of God and then life was rosy, wouldn't we fall in our relationship with him? We would have no reason to question, no reason to turn to Him, to seek Him, to trust Him, to really, obsessively want to know and love Him. I think that faith is more about finding God, in everything. Not being faithful ONLY when we see an obvious answer to prayer, but just as much in times when we don't. In waiting and listening, we pray. Our lives become full, real lives for Him. A faith-based, believing, trust-filled life is one of love for God where though Him we can work everything into something good.
Easier said than done, I know. But I'm working on it...
Verses to ponder: Romans 1: 17 (The Message): God's way of putting people right shows up in the acts of faith, confirming what Scripture has said all along: "The person in right standing before God by trusting him really lives."
Mark 9:23 (NKJV): Jesus said to him, "If you can believe, all things are possible to him who believes."
I John 5:4 (NKJV): For whatever is born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world - our faith.
No comments:
Post a Comment