I have been so excited to go to YL camp since I found out I could have a chance to go. I've never been to a YL camp, or any camp (besides Cheer Camp, and that's just WORK!!) for that matter. And from what I hear, YL Camp isn't like "camp", but has resort quality lodging and amenities, chefs, activities and 'club'. Also, the opportunity to grow in my walk, and then to be able to bond with the kids for next school year, AND to have the opportunity to be used as a tool for His purpose as we watch these kid's hearts unfold...I was stoked.
Until now...
Ok, so I'm still really excited, but I'm also nervous. I know this is Satan trying to creep in, but I already really know I'm going to miss my family. I thought originally I might enjoy the break, because I'm with them 24/7, and coming back refreshed might be good for me and for me to be a 'fresh' mom/wife for them. But now, I just know I'm going to miss them. AND worry about them. My husband is a terrific father, but he's not with them ALL the time, like I am. He lets them follow at their leisure behind him through parking lots. He doesn't know that Jaedyn needs constant supervision in the pool, if you wander, or she gets away, she freaks and flounders and takes in water. Of course, it will probably be pizza and donuts for breakfast/lunch/dinner for the entire week! I'm just saying, I'll be several states away, and I'm nervous.
I have to trust that everything will be alright. I have to not worry, but accept that everything will be okay. I will admit that this morning when my son was asking what I was going to be doing at camp and I showed him the video below, he was concerned for ME, and I liked his sweet heart and thoughts. "Are you going to wear a life jacket?" "You're going to wear a helmet, right?" "What if you get hurt?" I just comforted him and asked him to pray for me, and that I'd be home soon.
We leave Saturday evening. I will keep relying on faith that it will be the experience that I had originally been so excited about. I will keep praying that my family will have fun and be safe while I'm gone. It's like I feel safe in this bubble in my home. But I know and have to trust that no matter where I go, He is with me.
Verse to Ponder: Joshua 1:9 (NKJV) Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.
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