For ME?

I don't feel like I need to say anything today. I just feel so small, yet so completely and utterly loved.

All this...for me?

FOOD FIGHT

Just something I'm working on for the upcoming annual YL Food Fight. I'll be editing it at this link, so chances are, if you come back within the next few days and watch it again it will be updated. Enjoy!

Now go blow something up!

What's weird is I usually have no idea what I'm going to write about next on here. It just comes most times as I open this page and start to type. However, something is brewing and I feel like I've just hit the tip of this iceberg, and I'll probably continue to write more as it progresses...

I have been reading Ted Dekker books (AMAZING Christian Fantasy/Fiction/Suspense Writer) for some time now. The most recent I finished last night was Saint. In it, one of the characters says to the other, "Once born into childlike faith, brimming with belief, typical people begin to lose their faith. Society mocks them. Their friends smirk. They come to change the world, but over time the world changes them. Soon they forget who they were; they forget the faith they once had. Then one day someone tells them the truth, but they don't want to go back because they are comfortable in their new skin. Being a stranger in this world is never easy. Look at me, I should know. Don't feel sorry for yourself.."

Also there has been a song I keep hearing from a group called BarlowGirl. The song is called Million Voices. Some of the lyrics are:

Tell me who’d have thought that we would be so controversial
And stand up against the normal
Are we too outspoken, loud, and messing up the comfortable
Well we’ve been messed up also
Yeah, yeah

But how can we be silent
When a fire burns inside of us

Chorus :
‘Cause we’re a million strong and getting stronger still
They’ll remember we here
With a million voices breaking silence till
They’ll remember we were here

PAUSE THE MUSIC TO THE LEFT TO HEAR THE SONG...

Then this past Sunday, our Pastor talked about 'fanning the flame', being on fire. At the end of his speech, several (I'm guessing over 30) people walked forward to pray together. He talked about how biblically, we are all dynamite. Together we should be lighting this world ablaze! He ended saying, "Now go blow something up!"

In YL so much has happened, with the girls I'm with, but also with me. There is a fire, one I've been keeping contained, within me. But we weren't put here to see how small we can make our fire - and it's not what I intend to do.

The truth of the matter is, I'm just a small blip on the radar, but I was created to be a part of the whole puzzle. After I'm gone, my name will just be a memory, and soon after no one will think of me. It is what it is. But if I take what I have, my God given talents, my resources, my faith and DO SOMETHING with it, maybe I'll leave a legacy, maybe they won't remember me, but they'll remember what I did for Him. I'll leave a mark. That's all that I think He asks of me, and that's all that I want to do. My life is flying by these days, one day runs into the next and what do I have to show for it. Am I loving, giving, helping, serving, reaching, teaching? I don't get these precious moments back and leaving here without anyone noticing is unacceptable. (1 Timothy 1:7) "For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline."

I feel like I'm running out of time. My time here, all of our time here, is a 'blink-and-you'll-miss-it' tick mark relative to the time line of all humanity. I'm wasting my time! I know just as much as the next guy that I'm not doing what I should be doing, I'm not doing all of what He has asked of me to do. It's like I'm living thinking this time all belongs to me. But in reality, I'm living on borrowed time. I want to stand in front of the creator who sent me and be able to let him know how I accomplished, or at least attempted His mission for me. I want to hear Him say, "Well done, my good and faithful servant."

It starts today.

Verses to Ponder: 2 Timothy 1:6 "For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God..."

Romans 12:6-8 "We have different gifts, according to the grace given us. If a man's gift is prophesying, let him use it in proportion to his faith. If it is serving, let him serve; if it is teaching, let him teach; if it is encouraging, let him encourage; if it is contributing to the needs of others, let him give generously; if it is leadership, let him govern diligently; if it is showing mercy, let him do it cheerfully.

I am Yours

Ok, so last night we had a great bible study with the girls in my cabin again. I love being with them, their growth over the last few weeks is almost more that I can take. Last night we were talking through some of the Psalms and Proverbs again, and one stuck out to me. The girls asked so many questions, and others gave great insight. But through this Psalm there was a song stuck in my head. I looked at the floor as I tried to concentrate through the talking to not just start singing it. This morning I got an email from a friend of a very cool video...and it was the same song! Sometimes I feel like God is just giving me a nudge and a wink to let me know I'm doing what He wants me too. Almost like breadcrumbs...

So the Psalm is Psalm 8...and the video is below. PAUSE THE MUSIC TO THE LEFT SO YOU CAN HEAR THE VIDEO!!

Verse to Ponder: Psalm 8:4 (NIV) What is man that you are mindful of him, the son of man that you care for him?

I AM YOURS!

Sticks and Stones...

So we are meeting once a week with some of the girls from our cabin at camp for a bible study. We are just reading 5 Psalm and 1 Proverb a week. I'm putting together study guides from devotionals, commentaries and other study guides online...just condensing them and putting them in 'teen-ese'.

Here's one from next week...

Psalm 12

Sticks and stones may break our bones, but can words really hurt us? How can we be God’s people in an unfaithful, lying culture? Psalm 12:1 (NIV) says, “Help, LORD, for the godly are no more; the faithful have vanished from among men.” David feels alone, and craves the help of God. Sometimes the situations we are in, the troubles we have dealt with, the thoughts we have had make us feel that we are alone. The words of others can be confusing, misleading, or other times seem to be spoken with the intent of harm. Too many times we may feel that these ‘tongues’ are right and that we are in control of our lives. But God has the only words that are flawless. "Because of the oppression of the weak and the groaning of the needy, I will now arise," says the LORD. "I will protect them from those who malign them." And the words of the LORD are flawless, like silver refined in a furnace of clay, purified seven times,” Psalm 12:5-6. David understood that people can betray each other with their lies, their self-serving nature that can lead them to glorify and honor what is wicked. David says in Psalm 12:7, “O LORD, you will keep us safe and protect us from such people forever.”

THINGS TO THINK ABOUT: Do you feel like you have, or should have control over your own life? Can words ever hurt us?

Verse to Ponder: Psalm 12:7-8 Therefore, Lord, we know you will protect the oppressed, preserving them forever from this lying generation, even though the wicked strut about, and evil is praised throughout the land.

It's reunion time...

It's my ten year reunion this weekend...dinner, family picnic and mixer at a bar in Dallas this Friday. I guess I should be excited. But honestly, I don't want to revisit a part of my life I feel like I moved away from, grew up from, pushed back into memory and some parts, have taken me this long to just be 'okay' with. I certainly don't want to pay people to go back in time. Don't get me wrong, there are some people that I would LOVE to see again, and I'm sure most of the people have changed (let's hope). But it's not about the people, it's about me visiting that time of my life again...don't wanna do it. And it sucks because the reunion committee is made up of really sweet ladies, and I know they've busted their butts for these events.

But, I'm not going. I've made up my mind and moved on...

Except that because I was on the online invitation, several people have emailed me with the email I have on there. AND that's ok! I wanted the people who did email me, to do so. It's fun to catch up, in a non-threatening, no reverting back to bad memories, kind of environment. :)

But really what this has all done is see how far I've come, how much I've changed in the last ten years. Thank goodness!!

Ribbons and Bows

Ok, so I followed the example of a friend of mine and updated the Blurb. New look, music...good stuff. Let me know what you like, or don't. (FYI-You can turn off or on or skip in the music player). It's a work in progress.

Ok, so on to the last day of camp. We got up early for a 'believers walk'. We walked the grounds and listened to the speaker talk about what it meant to go from here. Those that went on the walk got new YL bibles. We went into the main club room and listened to some from our area talk about what that week meant to them. We watched videos, skits and then ate a late breakfast and started packing/cleaning up. We went to Club one last time and listened to the speaker talk about the whole week. I watched as during a time they called, "Say Anything" several students from all areas stood. I choked up as I saw ten students from Allen stand and tell about how they accepted Jesus that week. After the last club we all went outside and saw tables end to end in a line covered with white paper and surrounded by wooden chairs on both sides, as far as the eye could see in both directions. We all sat down and ate with our hands! It was to represent the 'last supper' and would be ours at camp. We got on the bus to drive 3 hours to the Mall of America. We spent an 1 and 1/2 at the mall - it was just TOO big for my tastes! - then got back on the bus for the remainder of the 20 hr. ride.

I learned so much about these kids that week, and about myself. It was amazing!!